I think I discovered my purpose.
I’m not gonna lie. I’m afraid of sounding pretentious and losing people by making that statement.
Everyone is so freaking cynical about personal purpose. It’s actually pretty interesting, because we talk about it so much and share inspirational quotes, but all we really reveal is how desperate we are to find purpose and how lost we feel most of the time when looking for it.
But I found my purpose. Like this week.
I can look back on the last few years and see how so many events, conversations, and words that people have said to me were all little building blocks that God was using to gradually bring me to the realization of my purpose.
The most recent building block is how I’m realizing that there is nothing more important than people. People are more important than issues. People are more important than achievement or my outward success. People are more important than maintaining a good image.
I think that God wasn’t going to let me see my purpose until that block was in place.
Actually, my purpose wouldn’t make sense if people weren’t important.
It’s important to know that I don’t think this purpose I found is necessarily final or that it won’t develop as time goes on. But having a purpose for the present is far better than none at all.
I find it pretty frustrating that purpose is such a taboo topic for so many people. I’ve been determined to see a meaning to my life and I’ve had to fight in spite of people who have the “sigh” attitude about life. “Just survive. Just work. Just follow the path. Just…” Just WHAT? Die?! Because that’s what I hear. I would rather die than live a meaningless life. That’s literally why people kill themselves. Because they’re more honest than most people and they have come to the conclusion that there really is nothing worth living for. Everyone else (not everyone, just lots of people) spends their life in denial about the meaninglessness and tries to squeeze meaning out of getting nice things or having lots of sex. Or something like that.
Anyways, I think everyone is meant to live with a purpose. In a non-cynical sense of the word that actually carries meaning and depth. One of the biggest supporting arguments for this is to just watch what happens when people feel meaningless. People are at their worst when they feel like they’re part of a story that’s not going anywhere. And when people are at their worst, bad things happen. And we don’t want bad things to happen. Therefore, people are meant to live with a purpose.
I don’t really know where this is going and it’s getting late, so I’ll wrap it up. If you feel like I was mean by saying provocative things that got you thinking and you’re frustrated because I didn’t provide closure in this writing, message me on Facebook or contact me somehow and we can talk one on one (I would enjoy that).
I’ll close by sharing my purpose. There are a couple of words that you might wonder about, namely “prophetically” and “army”. I’m happy to explain them if you ask. :)
I exist to be a builder of my people as God is a builder of me, prophetically declaring His message of hope, courage, and a brand new identity in Jesus Christ, being fully confident that God is using me to build His army.
If this was uncomfortable to read because it was so choppy and unformulated, I’m sorry. I hope to keep sharing my writings in small bits here as a way of forming my thoughts and gaining personal clarity while potentially providing value to someone out there.
You are loved. Your story matters. God is building you.